


for they are young and broken

by Aslee



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Found Family, Gen, Missing Scene, Teenage Drama, set post-rashaska attack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-13
Updated: 2016-09-13
Packaged: 2018-08-14 21:39:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8029768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aslee/pseuds/Aslee
Summary: Set directly after Pike kills Hotis. 
Cassandra and Percy finally have a talk about family and Percy's rambling ways.





	for they are young and broken

"The south wall was not my fault," Percy said. He didn't look up from his tinkering, but he could hear the huff of air that meant Cassandra was frowning at him. 

"They're your friends--" 

"Family," he corrected, without thinking. The air around him went uneasy and cold in the ensuing silence. Percy immediately regretted everything. 

"Cassandra..." He began, chancing a look up at her. But his sister, stubborn and huffy, was no longer there, someone who sparked an odd familiarity in her place. Lady De Rolo looked down at him now, the displeasure hidden behind the thin facade of noble calm. "Really." 

When she spoke, Cassandra's voice was the same flat tone she used in council affairs; She sounded like Percy remembered their mother, and his shoulders hunched up around his ears on reflex. 

"Then your family demolished my family's ancestral home." Her gaze narrowed. "You can imagine why I'm concerned, I'm sure." 

With careful fingers, Percy set his tools down. "Sister, do be reasonable--" 

"I am completely reasonable," Cass snapped. Her icy demeanor finally shattered from the heat of her rage. Percy watched the angry pink in her cheeks with a sort of detached horror. "It is entirely logical to be angry that you were alone for years with little but the dead and the sick to comfort you, while your brother trots off into the world and finds a new family." 

He understood the anger behind her words-- The guilt from that act had almost eaten him alive, before Vox Machina had found him. But on another level, Percy couldn't fathom what Cassandra wanted from him now. Would she have preferred it if he'd laid down and died? Would she have been happier if Ripley had ripped his heart from his chest? The rage that prickled in his chest was a surprise; Percy hadn't thought he had that much self-preservation left. 

"If I hadn't, Whitestone would be finished." Percy's voice wavered as he struggled to keep hold of his emotions. Cassandra did not deserve the brunt of his wrath. "The Briarwoods would have succeeded, you would be dead-- They would have loosed a fucking god on the world. Would being rid of Vox Machina really be worth that, to you?" 

"This isn't about Vox Machina!" Cassandra shouted, the pitch of her voice breaking the relative calm of Percy's bedroom. "It's about you, Percy." He could feel himself fading into numbness as tears welled in his sister's eyes. "You ran off and forgot about me, and-- and-- I'd rather have a dead brother than a live one who no longer loves me." 

"What--" Percy began, but Cass cut him off, her voice climbing towards hysteria with every word. 

"You're always gone, Percy. It's like you wanted to be the hero that saved us all, but you can't bare to stay here, or stay with me. You're always off, chasing some impossible prey. You're throwing yourself into a death wish, brother, with the rest of your party cheering you on. Is it so important to you to be rid of us?" Cassandra is impossibly young. 

It occurred to Percy suddenly, like a fact he'd always known but never acknowledged. She was so young, a child, still, and Percy could not even fathom it. 

Percy could not even remember what it was like to be that age; It was one of the many things he'd lost in the wash of the dark waves, the things he'd kept locked away from himself. But he did know what it was like to feel that alone, and what if was like to sit and shake apart from the pressure. The indignation in his chest softened. 

"Cassie." The childhood nickname falls from his lips, soft with understanding-- Percy watched her eyelids flicker at the sound, and tried not to count the years it had been since she'd been called that. 

"Everything I do, I do for my family-- It has always been my only virtue, and my greatest weakness. It's why Vox Machina found me in Ripley's cell, and why I came back. It's why I knew I had to save this city-- Because whatever kernel of my family that still resided here had to be preserved. But it's also why I have to leave you. If I let my family fight dragons and devils and gods alone, who would I be then? What would I have?" 

" _I'm_ your family." 

"Of course you are," he said, coming around the table to take her gently by the shoulders. "You always will be. All of you will be." The memory of their family hung in their air like an oppressive force. There was too much to remember, too much legacy to bear on the shoulders of children. It gripped at Percy's throat, choking his next words. 

"But Vox Machina is my family, too. Because I will do everything in my power for them, and they would do the same for me. That is all of family that I can remember." 

" _Percival_ ," Cassandra said. 

Percy tipped his forehead against hers. "I love you, Cassie. You will always be the dearest, most precious thing to my heart. But my family is large, and full of sharp, broken things. They will cut your throat and tear down your walls." 

She sighed, and, moving closer, rested her head against his shoulder. He could feel her exhaustion thrumming against his skin, and his heart ached. "That isn't very comforting, Percival." 

"No," he said, "it isn't. The comfort is this: They are good people, desperate to love. If you let them, they will take care of you, and they are _unflinchingly_ loyal." 

A tired chuckle filled the room. "Are you trying to get Whitestone to adopt your party?" 

"At the very least, trust them to bring me home to you." 

"... Alright. Alright."

**Author's Note:**

> my characterization is off and terrible 
> 
> sorry 
> 
> find my other fic and writing is at nixcarraway on tumblr !


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